You are not a virgin??? I said .
She laughed loudly like she always does; 'don’t tell me
you are ' she replied
Her laugh is always preceding her, threatening the
old cobwebs and bizarre contradictions in the minds of girls
and boys all over the Arab world.
'Aren’t you scared?’ I said
Why would I?' Her smile shining through her playful curiosity, 'it is MY body you know'.
'But we are Arabs' I said.
'Aren’t you afraid that you will fall in love with a
guy who won’t accept that?' I asked
'I wont fall in love with a jerk', ' I don’t want to marry a virgin guy’, I don’t want to marry a guy who wants to marry a virgin'. 'AND I don’t understand why are you still a virgin!'
I was amazed, intrigued, confused, and yet ashamed.
'How did you feel when you lost your virginity?' I asked
'I didn't LOOSE it! I got rid of it', she said, ' I felt relief, I felt liberated' 'I felt finally that I am in control over the worn out customs’. ' I felt for the first time that I am one, my mind is one, my body is one'. Many 'DO IT' without cracking the seal, you know hundreds who do, you know it doesn’t mean anything, men also know that you know. ', 'It is not a moral obligation’, 'no one has the right to have a red seal on me or you'
She always rocked the boat, she rocked my hymen's boat. I went to bed dreaming about this liberating feeling that I never felt. Afraid to break the seal and rock the hymen.
This is a picture from the heart of the Arab world. And she did fall in love, and she married the guy, and he is Arab and he was proud of her, of her courage , of her character, of her rebellion, and he loved her for that , he loved her for not having a hymen and still does and he loves her brain and body and depth, and the lack of hymen - who wouldn’t
Hymen hymen on the wall
without you they say
I have no virtue at all!
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